Jeanuary: A Reason To Celebrate

What’s it all about?

There’s a certain time of year when all the excitement of the holidays has faded, the New Year’s resolutions are dead or dying, the weather is generally wretched, and the bills for your Christmas presents are just beginning to arrive.

This time of year is known as January*.

I was born in January.

Summer Birthdays–ha!

For all you summer birthday-types who celebrate with pool parties and barbecues and cookouts and ice cream, I laugh in the face of your festivities. You have it so easy–you can wear flip-flops on your birthday instead of socks and boots. People give you beach towels and floppy linen hats as gifts. The Januarians peer out from under itchy wool caps, trying not to let their mufflers catch fire from dangling over the birthday candles.

Reasons to celebrate

I’ve had enough of watching the bright butterfly birthdays of summer float past. I’m here to eat cake, to open presents, and to make chilly, depressed, listless January thaw out a bit and perk up a little:

  1. Holidays are over? Good–less stress and more time to plan a decent birthday celebration.
  2. New Year’s resolutions failed? That’s okay–just resolve not to make any next year.
  3. Weather is wretched? Ha! Banish sleet and snow and drizzle and howling winds with the cheerful glow of birthday candles. Make a wish and then make like the big-bad-wolf and huff and puff the daylights out of them. Bonus: if you splutter while blowing out the candles, you’ll probably get ALL the cake!
  4. Bills arriving in the mail? No worries–lots of good stuff is on sale in January, and you can buy yourself whatever you didn’t get for Christmas.

Are you with me, Januarians? I say, let’s take back this grim, gray month in which we arrived in the world and make it worthy of our celebrations. There are 31 days to work with–if you’re a Baskin-Robbins fan, that’s a different ice cream flavor for EVERY day of the month. January also has enough days to lose a bad habit or develop a good one.

Wrapping it up…

The point of all this? January is a month that gets a lot of people down. It contains “the most depressing week of the year,” according to some studies (although the studies were more of a marketing ploy for a travel agency, according to other studies about the initial studies). Whatever. If you have a January birthday, make the most of it. Consider candle-blowing an aerobic event and wrapping-paper-ripping a workout for hand-eye coordination. If you receive flip-flops as a gift, wear ’em with socks until the snow melts.

They’ll be perfectly broken in by the time those summer party invitations began to arrive.

*Forget January–I celebrate “Jeanuary” all month long!

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